Thank you, Ladybug

When I was cleaning the kitchen last Saturday, I found a Ladybug. It seems that its good luck has been blessing me this past week. Work is back to being a pleasant place to be. The hours are weird, but I don't close ALL the time, so that is a plus. My car is now totally up to speed. Inspection, stickers, registration...all done! Spencer seems happy and enjoying himself at Yale. Perhaps the period of adjustment is over. I am feeling better, too. I think that we both felt that we had to make a clean break and that it would be easier if we didn't talk as much as we used to. But now we just talk when we have something to say and it is quite often and it isn't so bad now. I still miss him, though. I also miss him as a baby and as a little boy and all those stages of his life that will never be back, so at least I still have my buddy. Going to the casino with Allison later. We have 30 credits from PARX and it is too good to pass up. I should be cleaning the bathroom, but I am off Sat and I will do it then.

1. Paid the bills and still have some money left
2. Am going to the casinos with Allison
3. The kitchen is clean
4. Work is good again
5. I am handling the empty nest thing better

I'm back

Sorry I haven't written but I have been really busy the last couple of weeks. Seven Springsteen concerts can do that to you. Getting to them and getting home from them is exhausting. But when he takes the stage and rocks you for three hours, you forget all the crap you went through to brave the crowds and the uncomfortable seats (that you don't sit in once the show starts) and all the other distractions leading up to it all. And with the way things are, these shows may be the last. Chopper got to touch Bruce's leg. I was unable to get into the pit with them because I had to work. I had asked for so many concessions at work for the previous shows that I just couldn't ask for that day off, too. So I didn't get out in time to get the wristband and get into the pit. And someone had to look after Mommy and make sure that she got from Burlington to the show. But if anyone deserves to touch him, it was Chopper. She gets the tickets, pays for the tickets, arranges for transportation and all that stuff, so I was as happy as she was when I saw her touch his leg. Now, I have to get my house cleaned up and prepped for the holidays. Work has settled down and is not as unpleasant as it was. I am enjoying it again. But when you are going through a bad patch, you feel as though it will never end. I am now having trouble getting my flu shot. Its always something

Got my car, saw the Boss and Spencer

Sometimes things do work out...or even a blind squirrel gets an acorn once in awhile. Anyway, I now posses a beautiful blue Highlander. I feel bad that Vincent is gone, this car is so sweet. I have never owned what is known as a luxury vehicle and I am still getting used to it. Had a bit of drama when we found out that Spencer had taken the wrong train and ended up in Teterboro instead of at Giants Stadium, but thanks to Tommy, that worked out, too. We scooped him up at the Bendix Diner and didn't miss the show. Big WHEW! And as always it is a pleasure to spend time with my fish, but I wish I could make him happy about the way things go sometimes. All I can do is advise him and support him and hope for the best. He has the same flaws that I do...we expect things to go a certain way and when they don't...disappointment. And I was never a big joiner when it came to people and I am one to sit and eat alone rather than inject myself into a group. He is the same way, and that lonely left out feeling is not a pleasant one. But I am helpless in making it easier for him....the only thing I can do is understand. I know that one person cannot be responsible for an other's happiness, but if he is unhappy hen so am I...Because he will always be my little boy and a part of me, so I feel what he feels. And that will never change! So there!
1. After tonite I will be off 5 days
2. I have my Highlander
3.I saw Bruce Springsteen twice and he was great!
4. I got to spend time with Spencer (this should be number 1)
5. will be seeing Spencer again at the end of the week

Sorry I haven't written

I was too depressed and stressed to write. The hotel keeps bugging me about sending my credit card stuff. The hotel manager couldn't be more apologetic, but it has been stressful. I don't ant to get up there and have no place to stay. The attaining of the elusive Highlander has been a gas case also. The sold the first one out from under me and the second one is identical, except it has running boards and is a little more expensive. (was that their plan all along?) But that should happen on Saturday. I have to get the insurance and ez pass in place and worry about getting it inspected (it is coming from NJ) and all that before Friday the 9th. I was hoping to have some time to get used to the car before a long trip, but I guess that ain't happenin'. I had a great time with Spencer last weekend. I didn't even mind the metric ton of laundry that he deposited for me to wash. He seemed to genuinely be happy to be home for a visit. My friend who's son is at college said that she and her husband went to visit and all her son did was look at his watch and couldn't wait for them to leave. I didn't get that feeling from Spencer at all. He loves Yale and all, but he loves us, too. I always maintained that his wanting to go away to college was not because he wasn't happy at home and wanted to get away from us, but that he wanted to go toward something new and fun. And I support that. I loved going away to college and I want him to experience that, too.
1. Springsteen tonight
2. I am off of work today
3. I may actually get the Highlander
4. Cindy is going to the concert with us!
5. Had a great time with Spencer last Saturday!

My review

I had my review yesterday...with Chase. Jeremy wrote it but because he left for O.V. Chase was the one who gave it to me. The two areas that needed improvement were ones that I expected. My impatience with asshole customers and my inability to mask my feelings. I had thought I had overcome my scaring of the cashiers, but I did let Chase know that I let the cashiers know right up front that I am not angry, I just am abrupt when I have a lot of things to do and that that is the way I am. But these are things that I can work on, and I can improve. Other than that the rest was good, and I learned some new things that I want to use to make gift sales go up even more. (that part of the store is the only part that increased its sales and it was directly attributed to me) I know that I am valuable to them, but I don't want them to have any BUTs when thinking of me...so there you are. I got my raise (25 cents per hour) so I now make $9.25.

1. I got a raise
2. My reveiw wasn't as bad as I thought it would be
3. My cold is much better
4. My new car should come this week
5. Work went pretty well yesterday

Stupid cold

Yesterday wouldv'e been a decent day except for this stupid cold. Why can't thinks be nice all the way ariund for once? Anyway, I was worried about my car insurance going up because of my impending ownership of a brand new vehicle that is worth three times what my old one was. I called Nationwide and they said that the insurance would go up less than $100 per anum! What a relief! I didn't take into account the anti-theft features inherent in the Highlander! YAY! And work went well, too. Even though I got written up for my shortage (as I shouldv'e been) Chase wanted to me to know how valuable I was to them and how much I have grown and improved over the last year and that I was going to have a good review. And they are right, as head cashier I have to be PERFECT with the money...I have to lead my other cashiers to strive for perfection, too. Also, the Bigwig that was supposed to show up didn't come, which was just as well because Chase was going to showcase me and all that I had done for gift (it is the only dept in the store that has increased sales and they give me the credit) and I would not have been comfortable talking with someone while my nose dripped.
1. My insurance isn't going to go up much!
2. I am off today
3. I am getting my hair cut
4. The bigwig didn't show up
5. Good day at work yesterday

The deal is done

After many phone calls and negotiations, it looks like I will be getting the pale blue Highlander. It has a couple of things that I didn't especially want or need (like 4WD and the tow package) but they may come in handy. Can you say UHaul? Well, the Highlander could do it. It will be the most luxurious vehicle I have ever owned. Toyotas last so long, it may be the last one I ever own, too. I was hoping to be able to pay a grand a month to Mo and Chopper, but that may depend on how much my insurance will go up. Then all of a sudden, my mother starts asking Jaye, the Toyota saleslady how much her car would be worth, that she is getting to a point that she can't see well enough to drive. Shocked the crap out of Chopper and me. We told her to clam up and we would discuss it later. Where did that come from?
1. I'm getting a new car...actually, an SUV which has been a dream for many, many years
2. I got the grass all cut and nice...the last time for the season
3. I saw the kittens the other night and they were fine
4. Tuxedo now waits by the dish for her food
5. Finally got my haircut apt.

The waiting is the hardest part

Now the search is on at the Toyota dealership for the Highlander that fits my specs. The only ones that were left on the lot in Burlington were 4WD and that is too much money extra for unnecessary maintenance problems. So they will try to look for one with front wheel drive. I am hoping they will have the beautiful royal blue that we saw, but that is not a deal breaker. Chopper talked me into a Limited which has a few more bells and whistles, but after test driving both types, I wasn't too hard to convince. I still have mixed feelings about not buying an American car, but it just doesn't make sense not to take advantage of the craftsmanship of the Toyota. (Highlander is #1 in SUVs) It will last a long time and maintenance costs will be low. And the back up camera is pretty sweet. Now we wait and see if they can find the one I want.

1. Had a productive day at the car dealer thanks to Chopper
2. Had a really nice meal last night with Chopper
3. Got to wear and show off my Yale Mom shirt
4. We close at 8 tonight
5. It isn't raining today!

Looking at highlanders

The continuing bad weather has caused the Wood street Fair to be postponed, so I won't be doing that, but I am still going to Burlington to look at Highlanders. I am always torn when I am considering a new car because I usually get attached to what I have been driving and I feel disloyal when I want a new one. But then I get excited about having something new and that feeling of reliability.that a new car brings. And a Highlander is about as close as I will ever get to having a truck. But Vincent was/is special. Because Daddy was with me when we got it. And I still remember Spencer's pants practically falling down because he had to put all the change that was in Barney into his pockets because we drove Vincent off the lot. And Spencer wasn't even big enough to ride in the front of Vincent because he was too small to be hit by the airbags. All those hours going to and from Masterman, the trips to Lynchburg, the runs to Pittsburgh (and the nightmare ride back after parent weekend) Good times. But Vincent is getting on and the repair bills that have started will be getting greater and the Highlander will hold as much as the van does, but the seats fold down. Bittersweet. Red, however, will have to wait for my next car.
1. I am off today!
2. The rains puddles in the house have all dried up
3. I got to talk to Spencer last night, albeit the connection was really bad
4. I get to hang out with Chopper today (I haven't seen her in awhile)
5. I am happy that I could come up four things to be glad about

Really big storm

I don't know whether it was because I made a joke about 9/11 last night, but boy did I have a bad night! The howling wind and lashing rain woke me up, so I decided to get Spencer's things that I was going to mail to him off the porch because I knew it would leak. It was really bad, the worst I had ever seen it. I went up to bed and was stressing about mopping up that mess and the basement because that leaks too when all of a sudden there was a loud electrical buzzing sound and the room filled with a bright light from outside...then the clock went black and I knew the power was out and that a transformer close by had blown up. It was one at the end of the block at Lansing and Castor and it wasn't long before the crews were out working on it. Fortunately, Mike turns the computer off at night, so any power surge was prevented. But I couldn't go back to sleep. The power came on about an hour later, but I am still a little shook up. I started trying to squeegee the water in the basement into the drain, but the rain is supposed to continue till tomorrow. I don't know how I will feed Tuxedo. Nothing is easy.

Better mood today

The weather is staring to cool (Though I know there will be a hot day or two left) but we are getting into my favorite time of the year. I can't wait to see Yale in October...it will be fantastic!
Work was better today. I didn't feel quite as unappreciated. It was slow later on in the day, so I got my little gift books zoned and I made some headway on the games fixture. I like to do things before I get told to do them. Still really missing my little guy, I wonder if that will ever get easier. Tonite is the last day of my seven day stretch of closing...then two days to clean and maybe go to the casinos. I think I will wait about getting the van inspected. I have plenty of time, but I don't want to waste money getting that done if if replace Vincent. It will break my heart, but I have to be realistic.
1. Got a lot done at work
2. Saw Tuxedo eating her food twice
3. Have a beautiful new toilet seat!
4. Fall is coming!
5. Buffalo is back at school so I have the mornings to myself

Some thoughts about work

Sometimes I feel that I am not doing as well as I am expected to do at work. Just when I think I am really kicking ass, one of the managers will point out something else that needs to be done or that should've been done and it seems that tha amazing things that I did get done aren't acknowledged. Praise is being lavished on people who are doing what they are supposed to be doing, but I reset the entire back of the cashwrap, sell twenty new memberships on one week (and a lot of renewals, too) had two night shifts all alone at cashwrap, but it is as if that isn't anything special. And I find out yesterday that the reason I haven't been doing the monthly plan wasn't because I wasn't around at the end of the last couple of months it was because my math skills were wrong. Why didn't they tell me? Or at least give me more time so that I can do it right. I guess I just want them to think I am a valuable member of the staff. I dwell on it, too, because I used to come home and talk to Spencer and then I would let it go or at least I would feel that the job was important, but taking care of Spencer was more important. With Spencer away, the job has moved up in importance. Ah, well...adjustments for everybody!
1. Had another great membership day which gives me a great membership week
2. I close with Jeremy tonite
3. I got a letter from Spencer yesterday!! (that should be number one, but I don't feel like changing these around)
4. Mr Vallee is home
5. I got a lot of the Sunday paperwork done last night
6. The insurance money came and Spencer's tuition should be taken care of for his entire four years at Yale.

It's the holiday weekend, but not for me!

Have to work through the weekend, but that's ok because I am not a big fan of holidays. All that pressure of whose family to hang out with. This way I work while everyone is off and then I have two days off in the week and I can get stuff done. I really need to give this house a good cleaning so that it won't be so hard when I start getting ready for the holidays...yes, I said it, but it will be upon us before we know it. Anyway, I still love my job, but it can be a real struggle sometimes. They just keep piling on responsibility, but no time (not to mention monetary recompense) I am glad that I have a job and that I became a lead before they stopped having leads and that I am full time, but I do get tired sometimes. At least it will keep me from missing Spencer so much.
1. I had 14 memberships yesterday (9 new)
2. The money is set aside for the rest Spencer's college tuition
3. It sounds like Spencer is having a great time at Yale and if he is happy, I am happy
4. It has been fun having Allison on Facebook (I need to get Chopper to join)
5. Package to Spencer is on its way

Untitled

Work has not been as bad as I had anticipated, but I think that when my review comes around, which will be soon, I will be found lacking. I was a little disappointed that I didn't get any above and beyond nominations...even though I ended up all alone at cash wrap at the second half of my shift and yesterday I reset the entire back of the cashwrap...while ringing customers and calling customer orders. The hardest part of the job is that there are five bosses all with their different styles and all that they want things done. It makes it hard to do the right thing. But I am trying to relax and not let things bother me. The rest of this week and next are going to be a long haul, so I have to pace myself...Not on performance, but on stress.
1. Spencer is starting to get the mail that I send him (I hope he likes it)
2. Mr Vallee is O.K., I am supposed to pick him up from the hospital later today
3. Some of the tough work at work is done
4. When I went into work yesterday, I thought it was going to be really awful, but it turned out quite good...even got a compliment from Mike
5. The weather is just gorgeous.

One day at a time

Worked last night...too busy to get everything done that needed doing. Got a lot done at home before work, though. Have a huge project that must be done by Saturday, and it will be tough because I close for the next 6 nights and it is hard to get things done at night and recover the store, too. Oh, well, I will do what I can. The weather is beautiful and cool, so I am going to try to clean Spencer's room. Got a funny miss you card to send to him. Paperback book swap requested a book, so I will be going to the P.O. anyway.
1. The weather is cool and beautiful
2. Because it is cool, I can clean Spencer's room
3. I am off today!!
4. Mike went to work on his classroom, so I have the house and the computer to myself
5. I fell much stronger today

Today is a little better

Today wasn't as bad as yesterday, but I am still fragile. Cleaning the stove, getting the grass cut and doing some laundry made me feel like I had accomplished something so that is calming. But we went to my husband's great nephew's birthay party and I was doing o.k. till I saw the cake: Indiana Jones...Spencer's favorite character. Snakes! Why does it have to be snakes!? I did think that Spencer would e mail me by now... at least to acknowledge that his e mail is up and running on both addresses. Oh, well.
1. The grass is all cut and looks really nice
2. I didn't cry as much today
3. The backseat of the van is back in place thanks to Mike and J
4. Got a handle on the huge pile of laundry and will have time to work on it tomorrow before work
5. It was a nice birthday party and we didn't stay too long...just right

It's worse than I thought

Just got back from taking Spencer up to Yale and I am a mess. I can't stop crying. I will think of something involuntarily and the waterworks start. It is almost funny. I just hope that it gets easier or else I in some serious trouble. Menopausal women have no business doing what I am doing. Between the hot flashes and the tears, I am surprised I don't have steam coming off me. Is the car's radiator broken again? No, it's only me. Heh! Heh!
1. Traffic was fine going up to CT
2. We managed to move Spencer into his room and set it up before the rain hit
3. He was pleased with how we set it up
4. The room is large and quite appealing
5. His roommate seems like a nice guy with a nice family

It's almost time

Well, it won't be long now. This time tomorrow we will be in New Haven. Spencer will still be with us, but well, I don't want to think about it now. I really should be packing, but all I really want to do is sit in the living room and be near him. We have always been so close and I will miss being wrapped up in his everyday life. I know its time for him to off on his own and that's the way it should be, but it is still hard. Oh, well. I will survive. And with the way technology is today, the hard part will be knowing when to just hang back. It will be fun writing letters. I am looking forward to that. The five will be hard to come up with, but I will try!
1. I fell, but I didn't get hurt
2. I got the van oil changed and fluids topped off
3. Had a nice lunch with Mom-Mom Katz so that Spencer could see her before he left
4. Mike is packing up Spencer's stuff while he gets his organizer together
5. I will probably finish my book before we leave and I can take a less heavy one on the trip

A nice day indeed!

Spent the day geocaching in Peddler's Village today. We found three out of three!!! It started really raining hard, so we couldn't look for the last one. Too bad it was so hot and humid and then the rain...but we still had a great time!
1. Found three for three geocaching!
2. I found one!
3. Taught Spencer the joys of sealing wax...and he got a pirate seal (his res. college mascot)
4. Got the last of the things we need to purchase
5. Didn't have to work today

The Gator is O.K.

Last night when I called to check on my Mom, she said she wasn't doing too well. Even though it was 11 PM and I was on my way home from work, I offered to drive over there to help her out, but she declined. She just wanted to take a tylenol and go to bed. I told her that I would stop over after my dentist appt. I did and she was fine...I cooked her some breakfast and cleaned her stove...we watched Hell's Kitchen that she had taped. Then I came home and found a napping Spencer. In a little while we will go get something to eat and shop a little. Tomorrow I hope we can do something fun. Sat and Sun will be cleaning and organizing for the big leap to Yale.
1. My mother is fine!!!
2. Got to watch Hell's Kitchen after all
3. Spencer is already home, so I don't have to wait till late to eat with him
4. I didn't have to work today
5. Good checkup from the dentist...

One more day of work

Well, tonight is the last night for work before we take Spencer up to school next Tuesday. I only have one more fixture to get in shape before I leave,and I am hoping to get it set tonight.
1. The hotel sent us a note to let us know they are expecting us
2. Traffic wasn't too bad taking Spencer in to work
3. There was NO line at the Post Office!
4. The phone wasn't working (again) but it started to work, so that is a dodged bullet
5. Mike put all the pictures that were in dining room back in the closet

I'm back

Sorry I didn't blog for the last few days...couldn't get to the computer after I came home from work.Nothing earth shaking had happened, so I guess it wasn't too big of a loss LOL. Spencer's future roommate finally got in touch with him. Saw some pictures of him on Facebook...Looks like a nice clean kid. Hope he gets along with his roommate as well as I did with mine. We are still friends and keep in touch. Work has been pretty good...I have two more closings before I am off for a week to take Spencer up to Yale. Not my favorite ones to close with, but I will tough it out.
1. Got a lot done at work the last two days
2. Mike continues to work on his room (it still doesn't look much better, though)
3. Spencer has been working on his room (see #2)
4. Got a nice parking spot right in front of the house
5. Will get to see Spencer when I get home from work tonight

Fun day

Work was pretty good...I love closing with Danielle. Then we went to Chili's and a pretty good time. Lot's of laughs...some appletinis. It is nice to be included in a crowd. The Barnes & Noble crew are a really nice bunch of people.

1. Got a lot done today, at work and at home
2. Spencer is cleaning his room...always good
3. Mike's excavation of old photos wasn't as much of a disaster as I thought it would be
4. Saw some old pictures of Daddy : that was nice
5. Just happy that I have such a wonderful kid that I am soooo proud of!

Lot's Got Done Today

Well, AT&T finally sent someone to fix the landline. It took all of five minutes to fix the little corroded wire. While I was waiting I cleaned the bathroom, did the laundry, did the dishes and vacuumed the hall and stairs. Spencer came home on item and we managed to get our banking done and then we had dinner and played a nice game of mini golf. Mini golf is something that we always did in the summers, but lately we haven't been doing it as much as we used to, so it was a nice spontaneous thing to do. The only cloud on that was there was that Mike had forgotten his key and he had to sit outside till we got back. But we weren't too long in returning and it wasn't raining, so it wasn't so bad.

1. The landline is fixed and they gave us a thirty-five dollar credit

2. Set up Spencer's checking account

3. Had a great time with Spencer playing mini golf

4. Things continue to fall into place with our college preparations

5. Had a great meal at the diner

It won't be long now

Only two weekends left then it's bye bye Spencer. Still have some things to shop for, but we will have time to get it.

1. Sold 8 memberships tonite!

2. Enjoyed watching the Colbert Report with Spencer

3. And now we are watching one of our favorite guilty pleasure movies, "The Greatest Show on Earth"

4. I think Mike is actually making a tiny bit of progress cleaning his room.

5. I don't have to work tomorrow!

Who ordered that hill?

Cut the grass today. We have a wicked steep hill in front of our house and it is a bitch to cut, but it is now done. Lately, because of the rainy summer we have been having, the grass in the backyard has been so thick that it is actually tougher to cut than the front. Because it was overcast, it wasn't as hot as it usually is when I cut it in the blazing hot sun. Then I had a pleasant early dinner at Nicholl's. After that I sat on the couch and read and dozed and waited for Spencer to come home. I did get a nice checklist together of what Spencer will need for college and he went over it with me. And now today's list.

1. Got the yard done and it looks great

2. Really enjoyed my much needed shower

3. Mike is spending some time cleaning his room

4. Didn't have to work today!

5. Got to enjoy hanging out with Spencer

Five things

A few years ago, Oprah Winfrey had a woman on her show that said that if you write down five positive things that happened to you that day...it would change your life. I usually don't go in for those touchy-feely self help kinds deals, but I din try it and I don't know if it changed my life, but it was a nice thing to do. And then I started to forget to do it...and that was the end of that. so I think that at the end of my blog, I will try to think of five things that happened that went well and I will jot them down. I will offer up thanks to the LUCKY PIG in advance and then I won't have to mention it every time. So here goes...

1. Had a smooth close at work tonight
2.Sold nine memberships (four new ones)
3.Cleaned my kitchen windows and the ledge and it sparkles
4.I have access to the computer tonight
5.I can stay up and read because I don't have work tomorrow

Keep up the good work, LUCKY PIG

After several more phone calls, I finally got a firm date for AT&T to come and fix the phones. Of course, it means being a prisoner in my house all day Friday while I wait for them to come, but if they fix it then I can decide whether to get rid of them and go with Comcast or not.

Spencer is home safe and sound from his trip to Pittsburgh. It took a lot for me to let him go on such a long trip by himself, but he did just fine...better than I would have done at his age, or even now truth to tell. We still have a lot of arrangements to make in the next couple of weeks, but things are slowly falling into place. I would fell less stressed if things weren't so messy. Spencer has papers lying all over the place and I am afraid he is going to lose something valuable. If I try to talk to him he gets angry and brushes me off. I know he is stressed and nervous, too, so I don't take it personally.

No blog yesterday

Sorry I didn't blog yesterday, not that anyone reads this, but when I got home from work I didn't have access to the computer. And before I went to work, I really didn't have anything to blog about. I am happy today because Spencer is coming home from a weekend away with his Governor school people in Pittsburgh and the phone is working again albeit badly. The static on the line is horrible. I still want them to fix it. But that rant is too long for this blog. It is getting to be crunch time for getting things together for Spencer to go away to college. Maybe more later...have to go food shopping now.

Decent day, overall...thanks again, Lucky Pig

What is this Lucky Pig, you may ask? Well, when we spent a very pleasant day in New Hope last week, we tried to enter an very interesting shop, but you could not get in unless you paid 20cents (I just realized there is no cent symbol on this keyboard...$ yes, cent no) You were supposed to get the money refunded with a purchase, and we did buy something (pirate bling and fake mustaches) but we didn't get the refund. But no matter, the tiny little plastic pig has been worth all twenty pennies. J lost his but Spencer and I still have ours. I'm not superstitious (touch wood) but I like a good talisman now and then.

Thank you, Lucky Pig, for a pleasant day

Yes, it was a pleasant day (even though I once again duked it out with AT&T about our silent dial tones...ten rounds, no decision) Work was good then I got some good info concerning some financial arrangements for Spencer at college along with reassurances that his future dorm isn't infested with bed bugs and mice. Aside: the mice don't freak me out as much as the bed bugs. The mice would be chewing on left over pizza but bed bugs would be chewing on my kid. Anyway, I topped the evening off by going to see the movie Julie/Julia...by myself. And I thoroughly enjoyed it. I had read the book and though I don't really care for Meryl Streep, she did a great job as Julia Child. I don't mind going to movies alone, never had. I would prefer seeing movies with someone, but only if they have an interest. If they go just to please you, and they don't like it, you end up spending all of you energy defending it and that sucks. So there! I was supposed to go to a hookah bar with some of the people from work, but that isn't my scene. I don't smoke (I detest it) and it was BYOB which is just too much work. So I think I will just crawl into bed and do my favorite thing... READ!

whatever happened to customer service?

Actually...I am too angry right now to blog...I better cool off first and then I can rant rationally.

My fantastic Blogs

I write the most fantastic blogs...in my head. They are funny, insightful, brilliant and compelling...except I write them in my head while I am ironing or driving or doing something other than being near a computer. I used to write fantastic letters the same way...in my head. But when I sit down with a nice pen and a nice piece of stationary, I choke.

I want to write really good letters to my son while he is at college. I want him to see that envelope in the mail box and get excited (and not just because there will probably be money in there because I will put money in there...that's the way I roll) because my letters will be interesting something to look forward to. Maybe even share funny parts with his friends. My life is so dull that I will have to spruce it up have some content. I will draw some comics for him as I did for his Aunt when she was in college. I hope he doesn't be too critical...his drawing talents far surpass mine.

Work

Went back to work after two weeks off. It wasn't as wrenching as I thought it would be but I was really sore by the end of the night. I am not going to let myself get stressed out as much as I used to. I am still going to care and do my best, but I am not going to freak out if things don't go perfectly all the time.

Also, today seemed like a micro-cosim of what life is going to be like after Spencer is off to school. He had to leave before I got up and hubby was off to professional development so it was nice to sleep till 9 and then eat a nice breakfast while reading a book and not be bothered. And since I don't have to be in till 4, I have time to do some chores without being disturbed. I also want to clear one thing up right now! I DO NOT like to clean! I like the house to be clean and since no little brownies are coming in the night to do the work for me, I have to do it. Clutter and mess stresses me out and is physically painful to me. I wish my family would understand that. I am sure they wouldn't slap me or punch me all the time because it would hurt me (well, maybe not all the time) but why don't they realize that their mess is doing just that?

Oh, well...I guess it could be worse. It is just that the room where the computer is where I sit typing is in the middel of a shit storm of crap that the hubby has accumulated. And I can't clean it up because it is his crap. And it has been like this for over 12 years! And, no, I am not exagerating.

Back to work

Well, I go back to work today after being off for almost two weeks. I don't like to be off that Long, but I screwed up my vacation and didn't realize that I hadn't taken any this past year and my bosses were kind enough to let me use it so I don't lose it. But I Miss the structure (even though my schedule fluctuates from week to week). It is going to be weird not getting up at 5:30 and making breakfast for Spencer and taking him to school every day in the fall. I still can't wrap my head around that one!

Nag! Nag! Nag!

That is all my son hears is me nagging him. He has some important things to get down is less than three weeks and he just won't do them! He just doesn't hear me any more. How do I get him to do things that I can't do for him? I am so frustrated it isn't funny. Get you r stuff done and then you can whack around!

Pleasant day in New Hope

Spencer, J and I spent a very pleasant day in New Hope, Pa. The weather was nice...hot but not humid. It is such a quaint town with all sorts of interesting shops and restaurants to poke around in. Took a ride on the river. Had a nice dinner. Storing up memories while I can. My lucky pig was living up to his name. Tomorrow, I'll try to catch up on chores because it will be back to work on Monday!

Headache

I have an awful headache today and the clutter that surrounds me just adds to the stress and aggravates the pain. Oh, well. I have two more days off from work (not counting today) and a decent schedule next week. I have been on vaca for the last two weeks and you would think I would have gotten more things done, but I haven't. I did get to read a lot, and that is my favorite thing to do, bar none. More later.

Dear Blog....

This seems almost diary-like, but "Dear Blog" sounds kind of weird. Anyway, it appears that no one has read my blog, or at least if they did, they didn't make any comments. If you did read my first blog, you may be wondering, What changes is she talking about? Well, let me tell you. I have been taking care of someone for eighteen years and my life has revolved around his well being. I think I did an outstanding job, for he graduated top in his class from a high school is one of the best in the country. Soon, he will be leaving for college and he will be taking care of himself. And though we are very close and will remain close, he will never be my little boy again and though I know it is the way it should be, it is still a huge change and I need to deal with it.

Testing the waters

I will be going through some life changes in the upcoming weeks, and I thought that if I started writing a blog, it would help me through it all. I don't know if anyone will read this, heck, I don't know if I will even be able to find this so that I can write in it again, but I decided to give it a shot. If anyone is reading this, bear with me and give a shout out so that I know that you are there.